In this article initially published in 2018, Linda, a finalist in our Spiritours 15th-anniversary contest, testifies how the cruise she took with Spiritours in the Caribbean helped her in her grieving process.
(Finalist in our Spiritours 15th-anniversary contest. Category 1; How a Spiritours trip transformed your life)
December 2011, at the port of Puerto Rico, I walk with an uncertain step towards this magnificent Royal Caribbean ship. My eyes fill with tears, and my heart races. This is it, I will finally be able to release all this pressure and sadness that has been with me for the past few months. I lean for a few minutes on the boarding ramp, waiting for the line in front of me to move forward and for all these joyful-looking strangers to enjoy their often long-awaited vacation.
I would have liked to say the same, but I chose this trip to allow myself to experience some difficult moments in my life. Its catchy title (“Living is a Gift” Cruise) made perfect sense. I was going to spend a week with a group I didn’t know and two facilitators I had barely heard of before; Yves Groleau and David Bernard. I felt this surge of energy and this little inner voice telling me, it’s going to be okay… you’re in the right place.
As soon as I settled into my cabin, refreshed my face, and changed into summer and colorful clothes, I began to feel this sense of peace. What was happening to me? I had chosen this vacation to finally allow myself to grieve and cry all this pain that I had been keeping inside since September. Everyone kept telling me: you are strong. It’s not your fault. Get up, you couldn’t have done anything more. I had lost a friend in a parachute jump that I was coaching for his 12th jump. I was a seasoned parachutist, and everything had been done by the book, but life decided otherwise.
It had changed the plans and had failed to inform me. I was not allowed to stop to cry, work, being a mother, obligations, and repeated investigations. They absolutely had to find a culprit or an error, or someone or something to blame. But what if there was nothing or no one to blame? What if we were there only to accompany them through this passage?
Here I am on the upper deck admiring the landscape, the city, the other docked ships. I feel the warmth gently warming my skin, and for the first time in days, I smile. In less than an hour, I will finally meet the group and the facilitators of the week’s conferences & workshops.
A small group of 14 that would be perfect. People from all over the province of Quebec, from different backgrounds and fields. Each had their own story and their reasons for being there at that very moment. Unique people filled with love. We intuitively connected with each other, and an energy of sharing resulted. I feel good and confident.
The ship cast off, and we sailed on the Caribbean Sea. The first day at sea was exciting with the organized conferences and workshops. Beautiful work on oneself. Moreover, it gave me the opportunity to get to know my travel companions better. People I have kept in touch with through social media even today in 2018 and whom I continue to follow their life’s journey, year after year.
The cruise week passed in a flash. We visited picturesque places, went catamaran sailing, snorkeling in schools of multicolored fish, swam with dolphins, walked in the alleys of small rustic villages with field stones as paving, shopped at local merchants for souvenirs that they had made with their own hands, enjoyed the fine sandy beaches, ate like royalty and meditated on all these graces that life gives us.
Pure happiness. This happiness, we find it everywhere in our daily life, but sometimes we no longer distinguish it. We only see this dark veil that emerges from our feelings of anxiety, fear, anger, pain, or sadness. Let us recognize the little signs that life sends us, such as the energetic hello of a child crossing the street, this stranger who opens the door for you at the grocery store seeing your hands full of bags, or this phone call from a childhood friend who was just thinking of you.
Sincèrement, cette semaine m’a transformer car elle m’a montrer le côté merveilleux de gens qui m’ont acceptée tel que je suis, tel que je me présentait sans me juger ou critiquer. J’ai ressenti de l’amour sans condition, la bienveillance et le partage. Je vous aime tant mes amis (Lucie, Nancy, Jimmy, Liliane, David, Yves, Ginette, Lucie L)
Written by Linda, a Spiritours client in 2018.